For now

I dived into the wilderness,
Under the earth’s deepest trench.
Swimming endlessly.
Meeting creatures, after creature.
They all want my flesh.
I am getting tired.
My lungs are almost empty.
I am drowning peacefully,
I accepted.
I am almost dying.

I closed my eyes and said my last prayer.
In my final moments,
I want to visualise love.
As I open my eyes again,
A bright creature appeared.
Unknown to me, it smiled to my face.
Hope came to grace.

This creature’s life reverberates
To the core of my being.
Like an invisible CPR.
Without touching me,
It feels like it’s bringing me to life.
I do not know how or why.

Those flesh-eating monsters just observed.
They let us stride smoothly without interrupting.
They didn’t attempt to attack.
I could see their wild tendencies,
But they all just look frozen.
Or maybe, they aren’t.
I’m just not afraid anymore.
For I am behind this unknown brightness.

I am blinded by the light this creature elicits.
It saved me under water.
I am worried.
When it’s brightness wears off,
Will it have the same killer fangs?
Will it squirt poison too?
Will it kill me too?
Or will it just continue to take me away?
From this trench of mosters I am in?

For now, Iam just grateful for it’s existence.
I survived for a bit more!
I survived for now.

Ooops!

You destroyed her limbs because you thought it’s diseased.

The pain you have caused her was unbearable.

Huh, she will not grow her limbs back.

She will develop wings.

She will soar high.

And oh, she forgot to tell you,

FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE!

23 April 2017

The more of them I meet,
The more I lose grip on who you are.
Will you ever exist?
Have you already existed?
They all look like you from a far,but,
No one can steal Me away, the way you do.
Man of my dreams and life,
I have yet to meet,
AGAIN?

Maybe

Maybe I am escaping from now,
Maybe I am not.
Maybe I am running away from reality,
Maybe I am not.
Maybe I want to freeze the moment of not knowing,
Maybe I don’t.
Maybe I want to understand,
Maybe I shouldn’t.
Maybe I’ll just let things be,
Maybe I’ll let things go,
Maybe I’ll let myself float,
Heading to maybe you.
Maybe not.
Maybe you.
I hope it’s to you.
It should be to you!

Swipe

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Simplicity of exists, Door in an alley in Marrakesh, Morocco, Feb 2017

Her mom and dad met through a friend.
In her mom’s dormitory, her dad was beguiled.
He never let her go from then on.
They knew what love meant in their twenties.
By choice or by circumstances,
They decided to stick through happiness and hardships.
That was the norm.
To see what was good, choose, decide then commit to the decision.

Fast forward, thirty years later,
People rely on visual cues and finger’s movement,
To gamble,
Emotions at stake.
Overloaded with choices, to decide seems absurd.
Choosing and standing by the decision seems to be a stupid mistake.
It breaks hearts, families, sometimes sanity.

The norm is no longer to stick through happiness and pain.
It has become, to run away as fast if his hair isn’t what she expected,
Her breasts aren’t as perfect as in the photos,
He is into computer games.
Her movement in bed doesn’t feel right.
He doesn’t drive her dream car!
She doesn’t drink, and dance and party!

Superficial reasons become grounds to race to the exist door.
Selecting by eliminating seems to be the perfect method.
The problem is, choices are abundant.
In the ocean of faces and graces,
How and why would one still choose?
Trial and error and error and error.
Right doesn’t exist anymore.
It’s all just mistakes!
Stupid human mistakes!
Tiny weaknesses viewed as enormous barriers!

Stability of friendship and ambiguity in commitment.
Design of the future became the reality of today.
Traditionals break the most.
Conformists enjoy.

Kisses, goodbyes.
Touch and go.
Trial and error.
Enter and exit as fast as one could.
Wrong, they aren’t.
Love is universal.
Be it commited or not.

But reality remains, that in this framework,
Despite it’s beauty and convenience to most,
It hurts a few.
That one percent in this vast ocean of choices.
Could probably be counted by human’s ten fingers
Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two,
Me!

I was wrong for him.
Whilst I thought he was right for me!

I swiped right!
He just LEFT!

The wait

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Sunset by the River, Luang Prabang, Laos Dec 2017

Nail biting, cold sweat, I feel like vomiting.
Am I just here to ride on?
Obsessing over someone’s hand
That keeps on slipping?
Away, Far, Okay?

My legs aren’t tied.
But my movements are limited.
To fight this magnetism,
Would mean I will have to amputate,
My limbs, myself, my being.
Should I do that?

I want to run away.
But these rusty nails on my feet,
Are persistently being hammered.
I unhooked one a while ago.
Three forcefully dropped from the heavens.
Causing my blood to squirt out!
They went deeper than the one I just removed!

My hands aren’t chained.
My mind is alert.
My eyes, ears, mouth are all free!
But my wholeness is vital!
I can’t leave my feet attached to the ground!

Those birds and butterflies,
They used to accompany me in this ordeal,
They just flew away.
Those bugs and snails,
They used to massage my legs in pain,
They crawled away!

I am broken.
I will always be!

Strings of rejection,
Am I hanging on to the delusion?
Trail of heart aches,
I am waiting until my sanity breaks.

I am waiting!

Shadow

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Merzouga Desert, Morocco, Feb 2017

Shadow of the past haunts until sunset.
It will cease only at night,
Because the brightness of the stars isn’t enough to create it.
It finds it’s way back following me when the sun rises again.
I’m inlove with sunrise and sunsets,
Because they bring you back to me in the most hurtful way!
– Masochist

Focus : Self

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Hassan II Mosque, Casablanca, Morocco, Feb 2017

Peripheries ignored.
Focused on it only.
This thing has launched thousands of arrows,
Hurt a thousand, killed hundreds.
It started a war inside itself.
Defending itself against the defenseless.
Waging something unstoppable inside,
Yet displacing it to those who can’t fight outside.
It’s self-destructing and it’s tagging everyone along!

Morning question

I saw this yesterday morning:

(I wasn’t sure of their names) An ordinary bird watching a singing, beautiful bird in the cage. I wasn’t able to take a photo because I was rushing to work but it made me think , would you prefer to be an ordinary bird outside the cage, free but common or a perfectly bred one with sought-after looks and talents yet caged?

18 March 2017

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Child helping his father on the boat , Pak Ou Cave, Luang Prabang Laos, Dec 2016

With faith or without,
Diff’rences cause division
Same air we’re breathing.

Worst tragedy is when you meet a great person but he pushes you away just because your ideas, and/or faith are different!